Listening to Your Baby

I should have gone to the Lactation Consultant immediately.  Breastfeeding was not as natural as they made it sound.  I encourage all breastfeeding Mommas to take the class (probably provided by the hospital) to get basic knowledge, then use your resources!  I went to the Breastfeeding Center in Canton.  There are La Leche Leagues and Breastfeeding resources worldwide.  Getting help does not mean you failed!  It just means you are being humble and doing/getting what your baby needs!

Problem:  I went to the Breastfeeding Center at my wits end.  All I knew is "they" always said you should feed for 10 minutes on each breast.  The BabyWise approach puts extra emphasis on this because you do not want them to snack but to get a full meal, which includes the caloric-rich Hindmilk.  Micah was only feeding for 3-5 minutes on each breast, and then crying bloody-murder when I tried to get him to feed longer.  This ended up in a stressed-out Mom, which caused Micah to stress, which caused more crying.  Vicious Cycle! 

Solution:  The easiest thing was the solution, he was already full!  He guzzles!  We discovered this through weighing him before and after the feedings.  He was getting plenty in those 3-5 minutes on each breast.  I should have just listened to him!  He would cry and push away to tell me he was done, but like the naive Mommy that I am, I thought the experts were right and did not listen to my baby.  Lesson learned!  My baby knows best and I need to listen to his cues!  
New Problem: Listening to cues is my next big struggle with SLEEP!  Micah fights sleep. He is overwhelmingly active.  He never stops kicking and learning, which will result in a very smart baby and he is hitting milestones early, but my does this baby fight sleep!

It is so very frustrating.  We spend 30 +  minutes putting him to sleep with white noise, singing,  rocking, swaddling, shushing, which only results in crying, kicking, and screaming.  Eventually he tires himself out and sleeps, only to wake again after his first sleep cycle.  After extensive Google Research, I found that babies sleep cycles are only 30 minutes and some babies struggle getting from one to the other.  MY BABY!  After 30 minutes of a nap, we often have to go through a whole new patch of putting him to sleep.  Once he is a sleep again, he usually finally stays asleep for 1 hour to 2.  

I ordered the book "The 90-minute Baby Sleep Solution" by Polly Moore.  I am excited to learn from her.  I also like the book "The Happiest Baby on the block" by Harvey Karp.  This is also a DVD.

Below is an interview of Harvey Karp explaining his 5 S's to induce the baby calming reflex.  Very interesting.  I use these on Micah, and they certainly work!  I also try to do his concept of putting Micah down in his bed sleepy but not asleep so he can learn to go to sleep on his own.  This should help him get past the first sleep cycle.  

The biggest thing I have been learning with this sleep cycle is again, listen to your baby!  When Micah starts rubbing his eyes, yawning, and getting fussy, I know it is time to start our sleep routine.  I just wish it was not a long, hard routine like it is.  

Because of this sleep trouble, I have literally thrown the BabyWise Book away.  The routine and principles it preached did not fit Micah.  By the time I get Micah to stay asleep, it is not long before he will be waking up from hunger.  BabyWise wanted you to stay in the routine - wake, sleep, feed, wake, sleep feed.....  I feed before he sleeps.  He seems to go to sleep better and stay asleep longer.  

I struggled a lot in trying to find some routine with Micah at all.... actually, I still am!  With the colic, then this sleep struggle, routine was never found.  I know it is not good for him, but I am doing my best.  He is growing , sleeping, eating, and learning.  My job is done, even if it is not done neatly and "right".  

The First Month

No one told me that being a Mommy is a daily surrender to yourself.  I wake up every morning (and several times a night) asking God for help, perseverance, and patience.  He entrusted me with this soul, now I have to do my very best.  I drive myself silly about "doing the right thing" for Micah that I sometimes forget that loving him is where Mommyhood begins.  

The first month has been a series of unfortunate events.  We were overwhelmed with the outpouring of meals, dishes done, laundry finished, and baby holding that was at our constant beck and call!  The support and love Micah has received will raise him up to be such a Godly Man!  (It takes a village... right?) But just as Matt and I were finding the balance and routine of our new tiny family, BAM! Appendicitis!

I ended up spending 5 days and 4 nights in the hospital with an appendicitis and surgery scheduled for August 1st.  Thankfully, Matt and Micah got to stay with me so I could still breastfeed and bond.  Poor Matt had to play "Mom" with the diaper changes, constant cuddling, and nap time.  To say the least, I was very discouraged with the timing.  Why now?  But my boys were such troopers!  

After the hospital it was terribly hard to find a routine in anything!  Micah wasn't sleeping well, wasn't latching well, wasn't responding to us in anyway.  I blamed it on the hospital upset until Micah's one month appointment.  As I was telling his doctor about the new symptoms, he told me that is sounds very much like colic.  

COLIC?  Really God?  Micah must have heard him say that word because as soon as he was diagnosed with colic, it got 10x worse!  Constant fussiness in the evenings, and the worst part is his latching and breastfeeding is a constant battle.  He latches for a few minutes and then cries so hard that it is impossible for him to get a full meal.  It is terribly discouraging to watch your baby reject you and go hungry.  So I pump and cringe as he gets use to bottles.  

It has taken me to this point to finally admit that I do not know what I am doing and I am humbly going to see a lactation consultant today.  I am encouraged because I want to fix this latching problem, but I am so sad because I feel like I failed.  

After many tears, and Matt convincing me it is nothing personal, Micah encouraged me to keep going with his very first REAL smile :)  I couldn't help but smile back with tears in my eyes.  

I CAN do this.  One day at a time.

His First Month Pictures:

The Birth Story

Disclaimer: You may be uncomfortable with some personal information given within my Birth Story. 

God's Timing is Perfect!

First, for school, I had to get through May 3rd to not have to come back the last few days of school for insurance reasons.  May 3rd rolls around and I feel a sense of relief knowing I made it!  That day, I start having slight labor pains hours apart.  I did not know if they "braxton hics" or REAL labor pains.  I prayed and prayed to just make it though the school day, and I did!  I knew I might not be coming back so I even stayed late to make sure all my long-term substitute stuff was out and in order.  

During the evening on May 3rd, I start having harder and more frequent labor pains, so I start getting antsy and anxious because it was happening!  As the evening unfolds they continually get closer and worse.  The doctor instructs not to call until contractions are 5 minutes apart for an entire hour and the contractions have to be severe enough to not be able to talk or walk through them.  We were not quite there at that point, but because they were slowly getting worse and closer, I knew it has begun!

I told Matt to go to bed early, and since the pain was bad enough I could not sleep, I just paced the entire night.   Finally at 4:00 am I woke Matt up and told him he should start timing them because they were getting near 5 minutes apart.  As we were timing them, my water broke at 5:00 am.  To the hospital we go!  

The ride to the hospital seemed like it took forever!  We had to go through the ER, and get in the ugly robe.  Matt is starting to have to coach me through the contractions because my whole body would tense up and my natural instinct was to hold my breath, which is the opposite of what you are suppose to do!  Contractions were much worse and more scary then I even imagined.  

They emit me to the Labor and Deliver Room around 6:00 am and I was at 3cm dilated.  (You have to be at 10 cm dilated to push).  I was asking for my epidural immediately!  I went in this thinking I would try a natural birth, HAHAHA  yeah right!  :)  My suggestion to the ladies who want to have a completely natural birth, practice breathing and Lamaze more than once!  

The Epidural was awful to administer because they kick Matt out, and the nurse breaths you through the contractions as they are trying to find the appropriate place in your back.  Then they inform you : DO NOT MOVE or we could seriously hurt you by hitting a nerve.  This sounds simple, but for a women having contraction pains, it is very difficult and a little scary!  

20 minutes after my Epidural, I do not feel a thing!  Yay!  My nurse tells me to rest, and I fall asleep for three hours!  Hooray!

She wakes me up around 10:00 to clean me up and to see if I have progressed.  She checks and I am surprisingly 9 cm!  That means I slept through the hard part of labor.  I feel no pressure, which means it is not time to push however.  So they treat me to a popsicle, and I relax for a little longer.  

Around an hour later,  my doctor arrives and my nurse, Matt, and an EMT guy in training begin pushing.  You have to imagine this first:  I can not feel my legs so Matt and Mr. EMT have to hold my legs up so high that my knees are touching my ears.  With every contraction I push three times.  Pushing involves every muscle and fiber of my being to push.  Your private area is out for everybody to see with a light shining right on it.  With every contraction the nurse has to clean you up from "bloody show".  Often she even had to change the sheet under me.  Your sense of dignity is out the window!  

For an hour or so, pushing seems to be going well and I am getting the hang of it.  Two hours roll around and I am getting exhausted, and I am starting to wonder if I am doing this right.  I start asking "how much longer", "What am I doing wrong", and I start to lose confidence.  

The resident doctor and my OBGYN start to come in and watch me push because this is starting to take too long and they are starting to deduce something is not going right.  My doctor puts an ungodly amount of pressure in there as he pokes around to see if the baby is positioned correctly.  

At this point, it is going on 3 hours of pushing, I am exhausted, and I am asking the doctor about other options.  The options he gives me:

1. C-Section

2. Forceps

3. Suction

I seriously do not want to deal with an incision and do a C-Section after all of this hard pushing, so that is out.  I choose Suction, but I ask to rest a little first because I did not have it in me to push anymore, and my feeling is coming back because the epidural is wearing off. 

They agree to let me rest for a while, so they give me another dose of epidural and I rest for an hour.  

After an hour, 10 + people come into the room to watch the action!  How intimidating!  There are extra nurses there for Micah because of the extra risks that go with using the suction.  There is my doctor's assistant, the Resident, my Doctor, my Nurse, and several extra nurses for Micah.  I even think there were some nurses in training that needed to see the suction in use.  

As I push, the room goes silent and the doctor helps me out with the suction.  As he does the suction he realizes what was causing the delay: Micah has his chin tucked in his chest, which means he was trying to come out with the back of his head first instead of the top of it.  This obviously did not work.  The doctor uses the suction to simply adjust his head, and Micah is out in less than 10 pushes!  

The nurses take him and clean him up then I enjoyed skin-to-skin time!  I was crying when I saw Micah, Matt kept saying "You did it!  You did it!"  and I did!  It was so nice to finally have him with me!

The only downfall of the suction: I did tear funny down there, which caused extra stitches and quite a bit more soreness and healing time, but I would take that over the C-Section any day!

Micah Alexander Smucker

May 4th 2012

3:39 pm

7 pounds 7 ounces

20 inches long

The Hardest Part

I am HUGE!  Here is a picture to prove it:

This is me at 38 weeks.  

The last few weeks have proven to be the hardest for me.  I am having trouble sleeping, and I am constantly tired.  I have swollen feet and fingers.  I waddle like a penguin.  BUT it is all worth it in the end..... right?  :)  


Micah has officially "dropped".  I can breath better, but now my ribs and bladder has become his constant squeeze toys.   


My emotions are a mixed variety of anxious, worried, humbled, petrified, excited, elated, nervous, scared, ready....   


We are packed and ready for the hospital.  Brandon and Jessica gave me a really neat "kit" for the hospital that included all necessary items from hair ties to sweets to pack too!  Thank you!   


I have stopped reading any books or articles because I find myself becoming overwhelmed with new information at this point, and I am too tired to read by the time I get home from work.  I often take a "cat nap" as the hubby makes dinner.  


I am thankful for a loving husband that bothers me about practicing my breathing, doing Kegal exercises, and wearing tenni shoes instead of my vain attempts with flats.  He even puts up with my "nesting" :)  


Talking about nesting, the nursery is complete!  Take a look:

   I can't wait for my nursery to smell like a baby! :)  

I am blessed with my Mom willing to stay with me several days after I bring baby home!  I will be grateful for a experienced helper with the baby, not to mention help with catching up with the daily chores.  Thank you Mommy!  

I might even be a Mother on Mother's Day this year! 

Baby Showers

Wow!  

Matt and I are blessed with amazing support! It has truly blessed me to see the support Micah already has through gifts and attendance at the Baby Showers.  It gives me real confidence as a Mom!  If they believe I can, I CAN!  


I now understand the importance of showing support in these ways!  
My Co-workers blessed me beyond compare!  I was astonished at the attendance and outpouring of gifts and support!  Below is a picture of all the "things" they gave me!  I was overwhelmed!  I was overwhelmed again today as I was writing out Thank You Cards.  

THEN I had the fun of hanging out with the College Girls again!  Wipee!  It was fun just to see them again!  These girls always make my day with their genuine high spirits!  

One more baby shower to go, this Saturday!  The best part?  My SISTER will be in town!  Pictures to come :)  

Daddy Interview

Daddy Interview!  Enjoy!

Mommy Interview

Matt and I were watching ads for a Video Camera as a tool to capture Micah as he grows up.  We found one!  Below is our first baby fun with the video.  

Together, Matt and I worked up interview questions regarding Micah.  We interviewed each other.  This was very entertaining for both of us!  Below is the Mommy Interview.  

Soon to come: Daddy interview!